Archive for goals

Unqualified Criticisms

Posted in health & fitness, training for my first half ironman with tags , , , , , , , , , , on March 8, 2017 by runmyssierun

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It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

The above was posted by a friend who had endured personal defeat. Along with that, they endured immediate criticism, both constructive and destructive. From the novice eye, the two types of criticisms seemed similar in nature, however, the intent was worlds apart and could be understood by those few who could truly see.

If you find yourself in a similar situation… and many of you readers are success seekers and with great success come a great number of failures… you may likely encounter the unqualified criticisms from those who have no clue what you’ve been through and what it takes to get to where you want to be. I hope you learn a lesson from my friend who posted this above and I hope you learn it sooner than the forty plus years it took for me to learn!

Learn from those who have been there and done that before you. It is likely that they made similar mistakes along the way to their own success. Humbly accept their advice.

Ignore the squawks from the others who have never treaded near the journey you have. The envy they have of how far you have come is indicative of how quickly they gave up on their own journey.

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2016

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 3, 2017 by runmyssierun

Sooooo 2016 was NOT the physical year I had originally intended it to be. It did however, fill my soul with healing, enlightenment, patience, tolerance and an understanding of  how to balance my own personal boundaries that I so very needed to realize and practice.

I may not have finished “x” number of marathons or triathlons this year but the most important race I entered was not one that had a bib. And it had nothing to do with how fast I completed it.. in fact, I still haven’t completed it at all nor do I see the finish line any time soon. It is the most complicated triathlon to my knowledge. 2016 gave me a better insight to one of the toughest workouts in physical, mental and spiritual balancea triathlon with no T1 or T2 for me. It was an event that I never knew I signed up for but glad I was pushed into it.

For many of us 2016 wasn’t all we thought it would be for us but I challenge each one of us to look at what it taught us. There were hardships to overcome… and look at us, we’re still here! There were wrong choices that we made… and look at us, making better ones now because of them.  There were failures to accept… and look at us, we’re more experienced and smarter now because of it. There were dreams that got lost… and look at us, still dreaming.

I am still a work in progress. I am glad to report that I DO get stronger every day. Eh… sometimes I do have my weak days. Who doesn’t? But it never fails… when I’m under par, some one by me lifts me up and encourages me forward. Usually, someone I least expected.. how cool is that?

The last few years have been inundated with tons of ups and downs, super high highs and super low lows. I hope this year I get the chance to fully enjoy the middle.

Cheers to each one of us and all that 2017 has to offer!

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Defining Moments of Life

Posted in cancer, training for my first half ironman with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 7, 2016 by runmyssierun

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I have been taking a pretty profound 8-week class for work. I’m about half way through it. Today, my instructor told us that as a young boy, his dad would tell him that if he just made all “B’s” in school that he’d be so very proud of him. So what was he conditioned to do? He made all B’s. And all was well.

As a young girl, I remember being in the car with some family members. We were driving South on Sugar road in my home town and as we passed the home of the President of the University – a massively landscaped mansion to me back in the day – I remember blurting out to them that one day I would live there. I was quickly hushed, corrected and told,”You’re too pretty to be smart.  The smartest man in town lives there. Your brother may have a chance though.” He was smart. Boys were supposed to be smart. Girls were supposed to be pretty and delicate and dumbed down so that others around can feel superior, stronger and smarter. That’s how the world was supposed to be as it was shown to me.

I was conditioned to be pretty. So what did I do? I was never exceptional in school and I entered pageants because I was supposed to be pretty… where I was eventually told I wasn’t pretty enough to continue. So I was never smart enough and never pretty enough… and grew up always thinking I was just never ENOUGH.

For whatever reason, at any given point of my life, I was always surrounded by people who seemed to be nice and friendly and care for me… but never really encouraged or pushed me to see what I was really made of and what I could really do with all that I was. All it took was a handful of people to make the needed difference in me. Now, don’t get me wrong – I still struggle daily with the whole “enough” battle in my head – but I win a few of the fights in the end.

I do not believe that my story is rare. I think a lot of us, too many of us, were told by influential others what our defining limits were presumed to be. Maybe, just maybe, you were one, too.

But what I also believe is that just as I had a defining moment in my life that forced me to push myself beyond what I thought I could accomplish, you and many others have had or will have defining moments that will do the same. And guess what… I also believe that every day of life gives us all a moment to redefine us all again, too.

Experiences like this have taught me great lessons. Some in my own self and some of those lessons have been for me to learn to recognize the type of person who still tries to define me with their own self doubt, limitations, envy or other insecurity. I see you. It’s ok. I smile and nod my head to all you tell me… but I don’t believe a thing you say to me anymore.  The beauty of rock bottom is the wisdom that comes from it when you rise.  Yes, I do better when I have an encouraging cheering section but I have learned the hard way, too, to believe in myself and become everything you were not prepared to experience… my absolute best.

Who will you allow yourself to become? Are you ready for your defining moment?

Two shifts one turn around

Posted in end of summer, health & fitness, training for my first half ironman, triathlon training, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , on August 12, 2016 by runmyssierun

Not many people would correlate training for the sport of triathlon with training for a successful real estate season during a shift market… but, of course, I would.

Triathlon Real Estate

As in anything that you want to succeed at, you must learn all you can about the subject, put in the time and effort on a consistent basis, surround yourself with those who have succeeded and learn what worked with them, hire a coach, practice daily, learn from your mistakes, fill your body and mind with nutrients and be better than you were yesterday.

In my case, I have something pretty coincidental going on with both triathlon AND real estate. There is a SHIFT.

Injury, health and priorities created a shift in my competitive standing in triathlon. Politics, lending and demand have created a shift in my competitive standing in real estate. The ubiquity of a shift works well with my personality in that most humans resist change… I thrive in it. The core of my nature stands firm in most turbulent circumstances. Well, so long as I can keep my emotions and that sarcastic voice in my head tamed to a level of civility, I can stay pretty impervious.

The great thing about both shifts happening at the same time allow me the opportunity to not have to start from scratch but to re-evaluate my original plan to success, hone in and master

 

 

 

Overcoming the adjective

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , on July 28, 2016 by runmyssierun

 

“You can’t do that! You weren’t built to do things like that. This is for (insert adjective of choice here) people…not someone like you. You aren’t like that. You can try your best at it but you won’t be really good at it.”

Adjectives to choose from:

  • strong
  • skinny
  • gifted
  • rich
  • beautiful
  • outgoing
  • smart
  • brave
  • popular
  • single
  • married
  • assertive
  • powerful
  • younger
  • graceful
  • successful
  • more experienced

I told myself I wouldn’t write an entry here until (xyz has happened), but I can’t wait and felt I had to say this:

I thought that achieving what I thought was impossible was a super duper feeling. But do you know what is even more super duper? Watching someone else achieve what they thought was impossible and seeing how it completely changes their perspective, behavior and life from that point forward.

You know, it’s great to feel special.

But it’s also great to feel that you aren’t the only special one here, too. Seeing others achieve some pretty impossible things changed me as well. I believe we all changed for the better in the process.

I truly hope that EVERYONE achieves their own impossible. And don’t ever let anyone – even yourself – convince you that you can’t. This doesn’t just go for running, swimming and cycling… this is every thing in life. Put your mind to it and just conquer the crap out of it!

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Let your light shine!

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 27, 2014 by runmyssierun

“Is that you Myssie?”

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I had just gotten out of the pool and finished my run/swim brick when I saw an old friend and greeted him with a big, wet, sopping hug. It had been a few years since we had talked and caught up quickly under the beating sun by the pool.

“I was worried for you for a while. Just a few years ago you were on top of the world in Real Estate and at Rotary Club.” He beamed a huge smile when he said that.

“But then it was like the weight of the world was on your shoulders. And you bounced back. I see it every day but you probably don’t. You have touched so many people with what you have done. Don’t ever forget that.”

He went on to tell me that he’s heard of so many women who had similarly taken a back seat to their family once they reached a certain age or pivotal point in their lives. He also said that those same women saw what I was doing and challenged themselves to attempt their own similar goals regardless of their age or athletic background. His words were so validating to the laps I had just finished and the goal that swam around in my head. THANK YOU PATRICK!!!

Most of my life (with the exception of my pageantry years), I sat on the side lines in the stadium stands cheering on those I loved and taking photographs of them doing awesome physical feats. Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought I would be doing what I’m doing today. I am lucky – seriously lucky – that I entered this journey with some highly experienced athletes that had incredibly generous, patient hearts. They understood my personal goals. They respected them and never once tried to alter them. They were MY goals.

I had a goal many years ago to become Miss Texas and then Miss America. I was fixated on it. In four years, I entered 22 pageants and won or placed finalist in 20 of them. The only 2 that I didn’t place or win was Miss Texas. I was really really good at winning. I was uber competitive. So much that I became another person. I was constantly checking out the other competition, reviewing their stats and videos, finding their weakness and making that my strong point. I became that wicked evil girl that pageant reality tv shows spotlight for the drama and ratings.

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And that really wasn’t who I was but it was quickly who I was becoming. Thank goodness for Julie and Noe who both sat me down and opened my eyes about their friend they missed inside of me. Noe’s words in the courthouse parking lot will forever echo in my head… “Why are you ALWAYS comparing yourself to them?”

I aged out of pageantry, retired and hung up my heels but went on to “train” countless winners successfully with that lesson in mind. “Don’t compete against the others. Compete against yourself. Make yourself a better person.” And that’s exactly how my pageant trainees won.

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These women didn’t find a characteristic about another contestant to make fun of while saying it was all fun and games. They didn’t use passive aggressive antics to play with the minds of other contestants nor spread gossip and innuendo around the contestants. They won on their own merit… not by trying to dim the light of the others.

Your light does not shine brighter by dimming the light of others.

Long story short(er)… I understand that some people thrive on competition. I, however, DO NOT. I do not like who I become when my ruthless, competitive spirit emerges. It takes great effort to muffle that person that I did not like within myself (nor did anyone else like).  I am a goal oriented person. My focus is on MY finish line… not someone elses. My goals are measured by me, internally, by small incremental babysteps that go in one direction… FORWARD. So that when I fall, when I fail to achieve that step I was planning on, I know how to get back up and keep moving because I’ve been there already.

Larisa, my Matron of Honor, at my wedding almost 20 years ago!!!

Larisa, my Matron of Honor, at my wedding almost 20 years ago!!!

On Tuesday, I was able to put those mental blinders on my Matron of Honor, Larisa, as she ran two miles with me for the first time. She was inundated with the same fears we all have.

  • I’m too old to run this fast
  • I’m too old to run this far
  • I’m too fat to run this fast
  • I’m too fat to run this far
  • I’m too out of shape to run
  • I haven’t run since high school
  • My knees hurt
  • My ankles hurt
  • My hip hurts

I stayed by her side the entire time and put my iPhone on my arm with the speaker towards her. “Keep the pace of the music and we’ll be just fine. Pump your arms and keep your hands above your waist at all times otherwise you’ll get chorizo fingers at the end of the first mile.”

“YES!!! I do get chorizo fingers!!!” she exclaimed. That’s when the light bulb turned on and she gained faith in that I knew a little bit about what I was talking about.

“Ok, we’re going to jog from here to the light pole and then walk to the next but still keep our hands relaxed and up. You’re going to feel yourself losing your breath. That’s ok. Sing or whisper Mary had a little lamb. Trust me. I know it sounds crazy but it will get your breathing back to normal.” Ya, I think I lost her trust on that one.

I kept her stride short like the marathon shuffle and the conversation shorter so she didn’t feel pressured to talk and show the embarrassment of losing her breath to me because I know I am embarrassed to hear my own gasping breath. I needed her to finish this with strength and confidence to come back and double what she did today the following week.

Those last two light poles she hit the fastest pace she ran the whole time! She ended her two miles strong and fast and our conversation ended with the topics of glide and sports bras. SHE DID IT! SHE DID IT! And then she joined the rest of the gang for a beer. *I went home 😦

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It doesn’t matter what your limitations are. With the right people around you who understand and share and/or respect your goals, anything is possible. A few people can do this all by themselves. I am not one.

Like I said before, some people thrive off of competition. I do not. I thrive off of the positive energy and enthusiasm of those around me who also have big goals. There is a BIG difference.

If you are considered a friend of mine, please, know that I will never compete against you. If you try to force me to compete, I will either distance myself from you or let you beat me by not putting forth effort… or both. Beating you is not my goal. Beating CANCER is. 

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So to clarify, my next event is not including fundraising for a cancer organization. It is to make myself a better person inside. I am still healing and thankful that I have found a healthy outlet to do so for myself and my family. I have to do this one for myself so that I can know that I can keep moving forward. I fell off the horse at CapTexTri. This is me getting back on the saddle again. I gave my goals to my coach. In a nutshell, my goal is just to finish it.

That’s all I need to make me happy with myself again. Just finish it.

And then I’ll get back to my promise to Sissy and Momma in the right state of mind, love in my heart and surrounded by good, supportive people.

 

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