Still
This morning was kinda hard for me to get up. I spent a good portion of yesterday with my coach, Sandy Overly, going over goals, nutrition and new strength exercises. She had me focus on one leg at a time and I was really taken back at how weak my left leg was.
Determined to change this… I spent some time trying to re-do the exercises last night again. Big mistake. I think I may have overdone it a bit. My run this morning was strong when I blasted off… but didn’t last long at all. And then as soon as my legs cooled off a bit, soreness set in and now I walk like I’ve been riding a horse for a hundred years.
Aside from the muscle fatigue, the emotional side set in as well. News of Sandra’s father (who has pancreatic cancer) hit me hard. Last night she posted a very candid and vulnerable submission on facebook. One that I connected very well with.
“I wait for my family to go to sleep before I breakdown in tears-tears I hold inside all day from the moment I wake up! I have accepted the news we received 12 days ago! Stage IV Advanced Pancreatic Cancer Spreading to his Liver and Suffering from Dimentia! Surgery & Chemo not an Option with 2/3 months! I know this beast is going to take my Daddy’s lif, but down deep, I subconsciously believe that he could be Saved! It KILLS me inside with what he goes thru everyday! My brothers tell me about his extreme agitation, the continued rapid loss of weight, and how he most of the time doesn’t know who they are! My Daddy says, “SIR, can you please take me home!” My little brother Mike responds, “Dad, you are home” I raise my hands up in glory knowing what increidble brothers I have! Their lives have come to a screeching halt taking care of our Daddy! They are soo strong when they talk to me and give me details about everything BUT I know how much they hurt and cry! I write this as a eans of healing for myself! 13 more days until I see my Daddy again! I miss him and I feel so much sadness! I LOVE YOU DADDY!”
Still too many people out there who hurt like I do for people we love.
July 9, 2013 at 6:11 pm
Keep fighting! Don’t give up!
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